THE WANNA-BE

THE WANNA-BE
Hal O’Leary

My pen, now where the hell could I have put it?

I said I’m going to write a great big screen play.
An Oscar, for I know that I can cut it.
It will contain a large amount of gun play.

I said, I’m going to write a great BIG screen play.
The audience demands some blood to make it.
It will contain a huge amount of gun play.
Reality  is key and you can’t fake it.

The audience demands some blood to make it.
Yes, Wait, I think I’ve changed it all to sword play,
Reality is key and you can’t fake it.
And then of course we’ll need a little horse play.

Yes. Wait, I think I’ve changed it all to sword play
With cod pieces and cleavage, that should do it
For that will pave the way to lots of fore play
This is too easy. There is nothing to it.

With cod pieces and cleavage, that should do it
A time when men were men and women knew it
This is too easy, There is nothing to it.
I see it now, exactly as I drew it.

A time when men were men and women knew it.
An Oscar, for I know that I can cut it.
I see it now, exactly as I drew it.

My pen? Now where the hell could I have put it?

©2012 This work is the property of the author.

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Posted on July 13, 2012, in Hal O'Leary, POETRY and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. 7 Comments.

  1. MM welcomes Hal O’Leary. This specific form of this poem had me looking up villanelles and paradelles, but I’m told by the poet it’s a pantoum. I think it’s a well crafted and funny piece.

  2. Cod Pieces and Cleavage? I’m sold.

  3. … I think it’s a well-crafted and funny CODpiece –

  4. Dear Philip, In view of the comments regarding cod pieces, let me submit the following.

    TURN BACK THE CLOCK

    Be it known, I do not jest,
    I need to get this off my chest
    A female would say “off my breast”.
    That is if she were like Mae West,
    Who looked on them as her ‘hope chest’.
    The female will, of course invest
    In plunging gowns and all the rest
    In hopes that she can then attest
    From bulging eyes, we’ve passed the test.
    But be it known, I can suggest
    That I’m a male with some unrest.
    So, if you will, at my behest,
    Please lend an ear while I divest
    Myself of something I protest.

    While females get to proudly show
    The beauties that they have in tow,
    With cleavage plunging oh so low,
    And by that show, begin to sow
    The seeds that cause a man to grow,
    The male must never ever NO
    Display the gems he has below.
    The one time cod piece had to go.
    No longer can a man then crow.
    But it’s not true with fauna though.
    The stag has antlers, not the doe.
    And so, it’s well that you should know,
    It’s time for men to holler “WHOA,.
    REVIVE THE COD PIECE.”, and bestow
    The odds men favored long ago.
    What’s good for Jane is good for Joe.

    Hal O’Leary

  5. Prince Hal, I read film scripts in Hollywood and it’s not for Shakespeare out there! Yes there is horse and whore plays with much hidden cleavage and long cod pieces, there is sword and word play but so much of the scene is in HENRY THE FOURTH, PART 1. It’s not what you know or do but who your relatives are or what you will show and tell that counts for the success stories or failures. Read my novel MOVIE BRATS, a film script within a film script. Great poem Hal, you are a prince of a guy but royalty or loyalty won’t
    guarantee an Oscar!

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